What is God’s Will for Me?

Aside from being a homeschooling mother of two, I am a dentist by profession.

No, I was not fascinated with the oral cavity when I was still in pigtails. At 17, I was still unsure if the current course I was enrolled in at that time was the one for me. Nobody gave me sound advice then so I gave in to the “suggestion” of my mother who really wanted me to become a dentist.

I would say I was a diligent student. I had no problems studying, reviewing and complying with the academic requirements. I had trouble though with the clinical requirements because I would rather hang out with my friends than fix the patients’ teeth. So I succesfully completed dental school in 7 years instead of six years 😛 I took the board exams, passed it. Worked as an apprentice for almost a year then I started my own practice at home.

Years passed and my status in life changed. Got married and gave birth the following year. The baby became my priority until I lost the desire to see patients again. I was making a career out of being a mother and like probably most first-time mothers, I had a challenging time. Though my mother was there to help me out, I still had my own way of bringing up the baby.

After 3 years, I was pregnant again with my second child. I needed to go back to work to help augment the family income. But in my heart, I just wanted to close shop and focus on the kids. When our second child was born, I didn’t practice my profession anymore. I was hired as a homebased medical transcriptionist. I enjoyed that job and was so dedicated to it that there were times I was on the computer typing away while I breastfed my baby! After 3 years in that job, the Lord impressed upon me to quit. Though I was well-paid, I had to give it up because it was taking too much of my time already. Homebased work is not easy as it sounds. I was stuck on the computer chair for hours. The only time I stood up was when I had to go to bathroom or take a 10-minute lunch break. I took the job because I wanted to work and still have time for the kids but it was not as I expected. I needed to complete the job the soonest because we have to comply with the TAT (Turn around time).

As the Lord led me to resign, I obeyed. A week after, I called in the office to follow up on my pay check. My boss told me that after I quit, most of their clients stopped sending them work. It was a confirmation from the Lord. He saved me from the embarrasment of being let go because there was no longer any work for me.

I relucatantly opened my practice again. Old patients were happy to know that I’m back but my heart was not. It was always a struggle for me. I was asking God why He put me in the profession. My heart is not in it, I’m not passionate about. For me, it’s just a job I have to do because I have to do it. But if given a choice, I would rather do something else. I would rather start my own food business or pursue what I am really passionate about and that is writing.

I was blessed to read a book by John Macarthur, “Found: God’s Will”, which was lent to us by our discipler in church. I believe being a dentist allows me to homeschool my kids, attend bible studies faithfully, start my own discipleship group and pursue other passions because I have to the time. I manage my own time. I have no boss to report to. I am my own boss. I can accept patients depending on my schedule. I can always adjust my time. And the Lord has been working ever since. He has allowed me to work a few hours in a week and receive income from that. He knows when there is a need and he uses my “job” to provide for those needs.

I believe ultimately, God appointed the fathers to be the main provider in the family. While my main job is to support my husband by managing our household, teaching our kids and doing whatever needs to be done. I believe this is what the Lord wanted for our family. He wanted us to have a vision for our family. The vision is to have a father who leads his family spiritually, physically, mentally and financially. A mother who supports the father in bringing up the children and teaching them to love God and His Word and to manage the household while the father is working.

We don’t have a perfect family, nor is it ideal. But the Lord has just been so gracious to us that despite our shortcomings, our sinful nature, He is still abouding in love and mercy to us. If not for God’s love, where would our family be?

So whether it’s extracting a tooth, teaching fractions or cooking spaghetti, God sees my heart. I may not have the passion to serve as a health professional but I will do it because this is where God put me at this time. It’s not a change of career for me, but a change of heart.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s